I have this gremlin following me around and it's name is Writer's Block. Ever since I finished TDRH, I haven't been able to get rid of it. I thought I'd take a break from my characters and work on something I started before November, but put aside for TDRH, but I just can't let go of my beloved characters. I've tried starting the second book, but I'm not very confident with it. I love it so far, but I don't want to start it unless I'm absolutely positive. I should edit, I really should, but for some reason Writer's Block won't let me even try to begin editing.
Maybe it's not Writer's Block that's the problem. Maybe it's fear. I've never edited anything before because I've never loved anything I've written as much as I love TDRH. Maybe I just have a certain mindset that says "it's already good enough, you don't have to edit it," but I know of some things that need to be edited and taken out and just...fixed. It's three-hundred and eighty-eight pages long, too. I can't even begin to think of everything that happened between page one and page three-eighty-eight. Because of my furry little gremlin (I'm just going to say he looks like my cat because my cat is a creep that sits in dark rooms for no apparent reason), I've been thinking that I need to read a book on editing before I start editing. I think that's called procrastinating.
While I was taking a break from writing an alternate universe short story that I'm writing for my writing group (possibly they might get a post at some point, but I can't make promises :)), I took a walk and I was listening to Silhouette by Owl City. It's a super depressing song and I almost feel like I shouldn't post it because it's so depressing and it fits right now for more reason than one, but I can't help but think of how much it fits where I'm at with my writing right now. Or write now. Or edit right now. Ha.
Anyway, the whole song is absolutely sad and beautiful and Owl City is spectacular, but the whole song doesn't particular fit for me or my writing, so I'll just break it down.
"The fire I began is burning me alive, but I know better than to leave and let it die." - I have so many ideas for other story ideas that I'd love to start working on, but I don't want to put TDRH in a corner to let it collect dust. I love those characters more than any characters I've ever created, so I can't just let them go. Not yet, anyway. Someday I want to try to get TDRH published, too, so I can't spend my time working on other things instead of editing.
"I'm a silhouette chasing rainbows on my own, but the more I try to move on, the more I feel alone." - I've tried moving on and working on the sequel which is tentatively being called "The Prince and The Lionheart." I have no plot for it yet, which I think my subconscious is just hiding it from me in the crowded depths of my mind, but I love all of the things I've written on it so far. I also feel like I'm the only one with a completed novel that hasn't started editing yet. I'm not going to start making excuses as to why I haven't started editing yet because I honestly have none. And I hate making excuses to justify what I know I should or shouldn't be doing. Like procrastinating. It's not going to make it any better, it's just going to make you feel better that you're procrastinating.
"I'm sick of the past I can't erase, a jumble of footprints and hasty steps I can't retrace." - I can't erase the time I've spent working on other things, not writing and not editing. TDRH is a jumble of events from point A to point B and back to point A that I can't retrace. So much happened from the starting point to the finishing point that I can't remember all of those events. That's why I need to read through and edit and whatnot.
So, there you have it. It's kind of a sad song with more to it than what I'm getting from it, but to each his (or her) own, right? :) Now that I've gotten that off my chest, I should probably look at this little motivational speech I just gave myself and start doing something productive. Like editing. It all comes back to editing, doesn't it?
